In Chelyabinsk there was a memorial park for the second world war. It was very pretty, with a good playground for children and clean toilets. As usual the grass was 3 feet tall, which is a real shame. I didn’t care though as there was a long line of tanks on display!!

Unfortunately none were for sale, but while taking pictures I heard music and wandered off for a look. Someone was obviously making a professional music video, sitting with their guitar on top of a tank whilst being filmed. Sitting on a tank is obviously fair game, so I had to get my photo!

I asked the next passer by if they would mind taking my photo. A guy of about 50 took my phone without saying a word. I motioned him to stand back whereupon he fell over backwards. At that point I realised he was completely pissed! It took me by surprise as it was only 11am. He wouldn’t give back my phone and motioned me to get on the tank.

OK. He’s not going to run off with my phone and I’m not going to get a good photo – but I’ll play along. I realise then that I just can’t get on the tank, it’s too high! After a couple of failed attempts I kind of sensed that someone was behind me. I looked round and there was a tiny babushka, complete with head scarf and moustache – just staring at me.

I was about to say something when she bent forward and cupped her hands, as if to give me a boost up. I gave her a look, as if to say “are you serious old woman?”. She got the meaning and started shouting at me.

I AM A STRONG WOMAN! YOU ARE A SMALL MAN!

OK, OK, I’ll play along. I put my boot in her cupped hands and she boosted me up a treat, grinning from ear to ear. Drunk man could hardly stand up, but he took my photo and this is the result. It’s a petty good picture considering!!